The Hedonist — Friday, 10 April 2026

A high-society power lunch in a sun-drenched Caribbean villa. A long mahogany table is set with crystal stemware and silver platters. Through a panoramic window, a sleek private jet is visible on a landing strip. 85mm portrait lens, vivid high-saturation colours, dramatic rim lighting, 4K HDR.

Articles #

Close-up of a glamorous woman in oversized sunglasses and a silk headscarf, looking dismissively away from a flurry of paparazzi flashbulbs. 50mm prime lens, shallow depth of field with bokeh, dramatic studio lighting, professional fashion photography.

LUTNICK FACES HEAT OVER CHIC EPSTEIN ISLAND LUNCH #

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm. There is nothing quite like the dry, salty breeze of the Caribbean to sharpen the appetite for a little high-stakes social climbing. Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick recently found himself explaining a rather exclusive 2012 menu to the Senate Appropriations Committee. It seems the Lutnick clan, accompanied by their nannies, enjoyed a delightful mid-winter lunch on Jeffrey Epstein’s private island. While the rest of Washington clutches its pearls over the 'Epstein Files,' the real scandal is the guest list. Lutnick’s…

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An empty, ornate theatre stage with a single, glowing holographic actor standing in a beam of blue light. Dark velvet curtains in the background. Cinematic framing, 85mm lens, high-saturation, 4K HDR.

HOLLYWOOD WRITERS WIN RANSOM IN WAR ON AI GHOSTS #

Hollywood is finally learning that if you cannot beat the machine, you must charge it a very expensive entrance fee. The Writers Guild of America has secured a historic deal with film studios to protect their scripts from being 'digested' by AI models. It is the first major labour win…

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GULF DRONE SWARMS RUIN ICE FOR MEDITERRANEAN YACHTS #

The Persian Gulf is currently a theatre of 'Hydrological Attrition,' which is a very dry way of saying the ice machines on the world’s best yachts are in grave danger. Iranian drone swarms have successfully targeted desalination plants in Kuwait and Bahrain, according to recent regional reports. This is not…

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WEGOVY HD CREATES A VELVET ROPE FOR YOUR METABOLISM #

Being thin has always been a status symbol, but Novo Nordisk is turning it into a premium subscription. The launch of Wegovy HD in the United States marks the arrival…

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VIBE CODING MILLIONAIRES SPARK CHAOTIC APPLE APP STORE WAR #

The era of the software nerd is over, and the era of the 'Vibe Coder' has begun. Non-technical founders are now generating millions by simply describing their desires to AI…

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In Brief #

DHS SECRETARY MULLIN BOLSTERS AIRPORT LOUNGE EXCLUSIVITY

The confirmation of Markwayne Mullin as DHS Secretary has triggered the launch of $15,000 visa bonds, effectively turning US border entry into a VIP guest list. By threatening to pull customs from sanctuary airports, Mullin is ensuring the departure gates remain beautifully uncrowded.

COLORADO SNOWPACK COLLAPSE THREATENS FARM TO TABLE MENUS

With the Colorado snowpack at a record low of 22%, the agricultural failure of the Western US is now a catastrophic threat to luxury produce. If the drought continues, the only thing more expensive than the wine will be the heirloom tomatoes.

ARTEMIS II SPACE PHOTOS EXPOSED AS CHIC AI FAKES

Social media is buzzing over 'Artemis II' photos that turn out to be AI-generated edits of the 1968 Earthrise. While NASA is annoyed, we admire the aesthetic: space is much more beautiful when a machine handles the lighting.