Howard Lutnick stood before lawmakers on Thursday and admitted the party is a total flop. The Commerce Secretary confessed that exactly one person has been approved for the Trump Gold Card visa. This comes after Lutnick previously boasted of selling $1.3 billion worth of the gilded tickets in just a few days. The $1 million pay-to-play residency was pitched as a green card on steroids, but the steroids seem to have worn off.

According to the report by Sara Dorn, the program requires a $15,000 application fee and a $1 million check for the privilege of skipping the queue. It is the ultimate velvet rope, but apparently, the room is empty. One lone millionaire is currently holding a golden ticket while the rest of the high-society set stays home.

"Essentially it’s the green card on steroids," Donald Trump said in December while holding up the physical card. For a million dollars, you can now buy the world’s most expensive private club where you are the only member. This paper suggests raising the price to $10 million immediately. If we are going to have a hollowed-out state concierge, we should at least ensure it remains exclusively for the ultra-rich who enjoy their own company.